Lately, I have had no more time to squeeze. It seems from the minute I wake up, to when I crash for bed(!) every moment is taken with something. For a gal who loves to be in control of her life, it can get frustrating. And as fine print to that last statement, I should add that I like to be in control but I dislike routines!
Before I was married, I always squeezed in "my time" at the very end of the day - which could also mean some early mornings. And actually, after we got married and even after I had Judah, I could predictably have the hours after Matt and Judah went to bed to be create. read. blog. think.
But if you know me and have talked to me recently (this past year), you would know my world has changed drastically with Hunter being born. Having a colic baby has shaken my world. Yes, having kids PERIOD will change the world you once knew, but his life has actually been my hugest life change to this point.
What I could at one time control - my time - has been upsetted. Sleep deprivation galore, post pardum depression, and lack of "me time" have made me look at my personal staple of needing control more as an issue (as clearly, I can live without being in control or EVERYthing, ALL the time). And as it turns out, my frustration has ended up controlling me more than me actually being "in control of my life".
Don't sin by letting anger CONTROL YOU. Think about it overnight and remain silent. Psalm 4:4
There is nothing I would change about this shaking process in my life, because I've needed to experience it...and I got a darling munchkin out of the deal! I've needed to be awakened to the selfish way(s) I've lived my life and to be challenged at how I've actually used my time. Even right down to cleaning my house, I haven't wanted to let a schedule/routine dictate me.
But as I should be, I'm learning once again.
Learning that routine carries more freedom. Learning that everyone benefits from structure. Learning that if I don't make the time for something, it won't happen (i.e. blogging, reading, paperwork).
For all the earth is the Lord's, and He has set the world in order. 1 Samuel 14:17
If my Creator has made a perfect order in this world, He must have a perfect order for me. Right down to how often/which days I do my laundry, or when I should schedule dates in with my boys, or when to blog, etc.
I'm definitely in the early stages of this Sarah Nadine "re-org", but am looking forward to the freedom that I know will come with it.
*On a related note, how do you place routine in your life? Any tips for this newbie?!
pic pix: a picnic lunch with the boys - on a day we scheduled nothing but to be together, Sep.2014, Fish Creek Park, AB