Love is encouragment - I was overwhelmed today ... a lot on my plate at work, a lot going on emotionally within. The only way I can describe my emotions was as if I had reactional tsunamis occurring a few times through the day when I least expected them. It wasn't until m'Love talked with me and processed through the realities instead of the expectations and pressures I sometimes put on myself, that I was able to feel a peace, an "ok-ness". He encouraged me and loved me regardless of how my mood was.
Love is graciousness - Amidst a storm of an emotion earlier in the day, I happened to be on the phone with my Dad. It really is true when you're told the people that you are most comfortable with are the ones that get to see ALL of your colors! Even though I could've handled myself allot better, and we were both frustrated, I knew that in asking for his forgiveness, when he said he would ... he really meant it. That in and of itself is a blessing of love I could never have asked for more of.
Love is listening - I had the chance to just talk with one of my cherished of friends when I got home. In the course of our conversation, I began to unravel thoughts and spots my mind had been wandering for the past while. Most of it had nothing to do with the day that I had just been through, but either way, I know she would have listened still with the same intent. It's one thing to think a thought to yourself, and it's another to feel the freedom to share it in safe company knowing that you will reap the benefit of their input and/or support behind you regardless of what you say.
Love is really a wonderful gift ... if it's between the love of my life, family, or friends, its a blessing that is incredibly and benevolently showered over me. I love all y'all!
After not being able to post pictures on Blogger for the last 2 weeks, I have finally figured out a way to temporarily fix the problem (?) so that I may get still get my words out there! It's when you are not able to do something~eat chocolate, write your blog, drink coffee, speak your mind~you realize how much you enjoy those very things. As I am in the middle of a cleanse right now, chocolate, cheese, and coffee happen to be those pined for food items, when normally I do not crave them as much (... well, maybe!). So, though food I may be without, I've at least got my 'voice' back today!!
pic pix: words of "Love" carved in a tree, Mesa, AZ May.2010
As a wee one, my mom read my brother and I Eric Carle's - The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Everytime she would get to the word "cocoon", we would laugh in hysterics! Not really even sure why, except that it sounded funny. Then, as I got a little bit older (7 or 8) and learnt the words "photosynthesis" and "metamorphosis"... and me, being smarter than the teacher, thought I would add them to a story I wrote (which, by the way, had nothing to do with either of the subjects!). If I could only find it now ... though I think I threw it out because I was so embarrassed!
Lately, I've thought a lot about change, transformation, and how we really go through a continual alterations in our lives. Unlike the caterpillar, that undergoes one major evolving process in it's entire existence, we, as humans, get to experience every stage over and over ... metamorphosis.
"My mind, thoughts, and emotions have been a tingly tumult as of late ... the biggest result of my current life changes. Facing life as you don't know it, trying to jive within my own life's "groove", feeling like the new shoes I'm now walking in will never fit comfortably ... it's all exciting and the best decisions (house-move & job-move) I could make for myself right now ... "
I wrote this in my journal the other week, shadowed with much stirred emotion. Things are temporal, and reshaping happens all the time, and usually, I welcome it ... anticipating the opportunity to get a refreshed traction. This time I felt trapped in a cocoon - no way out, set perspective, stuck. Then ... I read this:
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-His good, pleasing, and perfect will.
I have been transformed, renewed, and blessed by God just by seeking His will! No, not all my disruptions feel at peace, but yet, I can be sure that He will be here as I break out of this cocoon I've been in and as I go through my metamorphosis.