26 September 2011

put it away.02

As proven in my last "accidental" post ... my habit of not "putting away" persists!  The other night, I left my "put it away" post open on my computer before I went to bed.  The next evening, my husband mentioned that he had read my recent post, and I was like, "What new post?".  We figured that he had read it from my "drafts" folder in Blogger earlier that the morning from my laptop.  But apparently, as my sister-in-law pointed out today ... unknowingly, the post got published!!  Without me having the slightest clue!  Not sure if it was me or my husband who incidentally published it(!) ... either way, it brought laughs on this end, because it very well exhibited how things can get kooky when not put away properly!

To continue my thoughts from the previous post ....

The more I have been thinking about "putting away" (time, things, etc...), it has dawned on me that that is exactly how I approach the idea of forgiving myself.  If I don't accomplish something the way it has played out in my mind and if I haven't reached all that I intended to do, instead of letting it go and putting away my disappointments, I become harder on myself and set higher expectations than initially.  Mainly, just so that I can make up for it.  It almost seems like I have to prove to myself  that I am capable of doing that which I originally envisioned before I can let it go and put that task to rest.

Just like my clean dishes are waiting right now to get put away, it's time I put away these essentially, self-created burdens, and start living with a clean, new to-do list and set of expectations daily.  Forgiving myself is hard to do.  Yes, even the small stuff can make me sweat.  But today, accepting my weaknesses will not put it off a day longer...but will be put it away.

How do you deal with this in your day-to-day?

pic pix: taking time for us, Highway 40, Kananaskis, Alberta, 18.Sept.2011

21 September 2011

put it away.01

Usually, my lack of writing has been a result of "unfound inspiration" or lack of time ... lately, it has definitely been the latter.  How people manage to work full-time, be a good wife, be a good mom, be healthy (mentally and physically), enjoy the mountains, have a social life, still be a nice (not grouchy) person, AND blog?!  You people amaze me!!  Even during the days of our engagement, I had all of these plans to blog my wedding ideas and plans,  post pictures, etc. etc.  As you rightly saw, that never happened!  To those of you that do and have ... wow!

More and more lately, I've been sensing the urgency to "put time away".  Time to spend with my husband, MYSELF, friends...God.  Literally, the minutes tick away so quickly, and it's easy to just set things aside and not do them.  Because something in the moment comes up, I drop those "need-time-for" things and it gets put off for a while.

One of my worst habits is not putting things away (ironic?).  I don't mind putting dirty dishes into the dishwasher, but to put away the clean ones?  Eep!  Folding laundry...I actually love folding laundry.  There's something so "feel-good" about getting the creases to fold just right.   But to put those folded clothes away?!  Last night, I parked all of my folded clothes in the dresser that had been sitting in the basket for over a week.  How is this possible?!

The more I have been thinking about "putting away" (time, things, etc...), it has dawned on me that that is how I deal with forgiving myself.  What really is happening, is that I am not accepting t


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